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The moment I wake up, before I put on my makeup,I say a little prayer for Dionne Warwick.
Why? Well, the 80-year-old singer, actor, and highly sought-after Twitter employee makes our feeds a happier place, and we must protect her at all costs.
Warwick officially joined Twitter in 2012, but she recently found her hilarious social media groove thanks to some help from her niece and personal Twitter coach, Brittani Warrick.
Now, Warwick — who calls tweeting "twoting" and whose bio boldly states, "I am not writing a bio" — uses the platform to follow and engage with fans, write other peoples' Twitter bios, request pet photos, share her love of Bridgerton, and directly @ Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey on a regular basis.
She's just like us, except funnier. That's why the internet has dubbed her the Queen of Twitter.
It's hard to sum up the brilliance of Warwick's Twitter in one mid-year list, but the least we can do is highlight 26 of her best tweets from 2021 (so far). From clever quips to brutal burns, Dionne Warwick's tweeting is a beauty to behold.
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You can watch the full masterpiece, which stars Ego Nwodim as Dionne Warwick and Timothée Chalamet as Harry Styles, below. There's even a Dionne Twitter shoutout!
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When Jada Pinkett Smith didn't respond right away you'd better believe Ms. Warwick followed up, with a GIF and everything. Now she'll be the first to know when Will Smith gets an account.
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When a follower asked Warwick if she'd egg the house if it was warm outside, she simply replied, "Wishing everyone a wonderful Monday!" Iconic.
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Ask her to unfollow and see what happens.
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Just an FYI: "That wasn't dating advice. You're on your own there." If you tell someone you love them and it backfires, do notsay Dionne Warwick sent you.
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In March, Dionne Warwick attempted to uncover the story behind a cursed recipe that included mayonnaise, candied fruit, almonds, and pineapple. She @'d Kraft mayo directly on her quest for answers, but as you can see in the above tweet, she didn't get any. It seems Warwick is also famously anti-Kraft mayo and pro Hellmann's mayo at this moment in time. Devastating blow for Kraft.
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We're sure there are many more top-tier tweets to come, so we'll revisit this glorious account at the end of the year.
For now, in the words of Dionne Warwick: Ok... Bye! ❤️
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